True confessions of a city slicker

So last Saturday TG and I orchestrated a little family outing to a Fall Festival at McLeod Farms in McBee, South Carolina.

There was to be pumpkin-pickin' and hayrides and good food and music and all manner of festival-ish goings-on.

Audrey came home for the weekend, from Knoxville. Erica came home for the weekend, from McDonough.

TG, working in North Carolina, brought Melanie and Allissa home with him Friday night.

Stephanie came from Lenoir on Saturday to join us in McBee.

It was quite the logistical feat if I do say so myself.

Especially when you consider it's seventy-five miles from Columbia to McBee, and more than half those miles are not Interstate.

You have to get off I-20 East in Camden and wend your way to McBee on secondary roads.

But we made it.

And it was hot, y'all. Not as humid as a month ago, but still hot.

And it was exceedingly crowded (long lines, very long lines, for everything), which for some reason always takes me aback.

I do not like standing in lines. The only one I stood in all day was to pay for a loaf of fresh-baked sweet potato pecan bread, and it was worth it.

Allissa rode with TG and me; Melly hung out with her aunties in the second car.

You never heard a child ask "Why?" so many times.

Typical conversation ... this took place when we stopped to gas up the vehicles:

Allissa: What's Papaw doin'?

Me: He's putting gas in the car.

Allissa: Why?

Me: Because without gas, the car won't go.

Allissa: Why?

Me: Because cars run on gas and sometimes they run out.

Allissa: Why?

Me: Because you drive a whole bunch of miles and then there's no more gas in the car and then you have to get more.

Allissa: What's Papaw doin'?

Me: Allissa, I just got done explaining to you in excruciating detail what Papaw is doing. He's putting gas in the car.

Allissa: Why?

Me: ALLISSA! Because the car needs gas to go! I told you all of this!

Allissa: Okay.

Stephanie arrived at the farm ahead of us and had stood in line for a half hour to order lunch for the girls.

They chowed down on chicken fingers and french fries, no questions asked. Kids never wonder where the food came from. I think they believe in vittle fairies ... if they think about it it all, which is doubtful.

Then it was time to "drive" the antique tractors. Melanie was persuaded to try a Farmall. She lasted all of thirty seconds before wanting to get down.

But Allissa, the fuel-conscious one, knows nothing runs like a Deere. She couldn't get enough of "driving."

There were a plethora of vintage farm instruments. Melanie was inclined to prime an ornate pump.

Allissa "rode" in a motorized carriage with Aunt Audrey, then posed on the running board.

We toured "Mac's" antique museum, which is mostly stuffed with vintage automobiles, but has a lot of other cool stuff too. The collection is pretty extensive and all the cars are in fantastic condition.

A charming poster of Shirley Temple as a junior aviator presides over the parade of gleaming metal and glass.

A shiny black Ford Model-some-letter was my favorite. Very Public Enemies.

I wanted to take this machine home. Who doesn't need to know their wate and fate?

This barber chair was very Sweeney Todd.

The old-timey booster seat reminded me of a spider with, like, lumbago or something. Or maybe an arachno-contortionist with webbed feet or unilegs. You decide.

This geriatric soft drink machine took me back. They had these in country stores when I was a kid.

The girls were very good while we grownups looked at all the old stuff but they were more than ready to go back outside into fresher air.

Hotter air, too.

There were helicopter rides but we didn't go on one. We just watched. TG didn't think twenty dollars for a five-minute ride was a very good deal and I agreed. 

Five dollars for a twenty-minute ride would've been better. But you've got to love capitalism. This thing buzzed overhead all day long.

I never could figure out if the scarecrow was trying to get up or down the windmill, or what he intended to do with the broom. Somewhat reminiscent of Arnie's chronic hijinks in What's Eating Gilbert Grape.

Allissa eventually copped a ride on Papaw's shoulders. She insisted on pointing at everything. No doubt from her lips came an endless string of "Why?"s.

She ended up borrowing Audrey's shades.

Sweet, courageous horses pulled heavy wagons full of tourists all day.

There was a lot of dust and dirt. I do not like to be hot, standing in dust and dirt.

I think Melly was over it too.

Allissa was still living large, courtesy of a very patient Papaw.

Still pushing her borrowed shades up onto her nose.

Still pointing ... still asking "Why?"

It was my turn to ask "Why?" when I saw this:

But then, my thoughts were on feet at the moment because mine needed a bath. Did I mention all the dust and dirt? 

You should've seen the dirt coating my car ... which, by the way, got STUCK in that dirt. It looked dicey for a couple uneasy minutes.

TG had to use the handy "snowflake" traction button to get us out. We're city slickers; I admit it.

It was hot; it was dusty; it was crowded; it was hot. Did I mention it was hot?

But it was fun. It's now memories. I like that.

Comments

[Sue the hobbit]

Rainy, windy and stormy here. Jealous? Looks like a fun day. Did you wear The Shoes? See, I would have been in tennis shoes, and then my feet wouldn't have been dusty. Just sayin'.
Love the pics of hubby and Allissa, they look like good buddies.

[Jennifer]

@Sue ... Girl let me tell you, your feet would've been dusty/dirty no matter what you wore. Audrey had on flats and her feet AND her shoes were BLACK. I wore flip-flops (very low flat ones, gold, LOL) and it was probably better for me because the dirt wasn't grinding into my feet all day! It was just a bit much after such a long, hot summer. It's supposed to be 85+ degrees here tomorrow ... well, I should say later today. I need to go to bed! And you're right about TG and Lissy ... they're a mutual admiration society.

BTW I would be jeal but it was stormy here today! I loved it.

[Mari]

What fun! I love all the car pictures, and the pictures of TG and Allissa are so sweet! I must admit that I'm not into hot and dusty either, but glad you got good memories!

['Aunt Amelia']

Fun!

Memories!!!

And I can't leave without *appreciating* a very handsome 'Papaw'!

Hey, I sez 'em as I seeeez 'em! ,-)

[Jennifer]

@Mari ... you've got to take the bad with the good, and this wasn't so bad. It truly was worth it but I'm just ready for some of that Michigan fall weather!

@Amelia ... oh, thank you for noticing how handsome is my darling TG! He's just as sweet as he is good-looking, too. I got very lucky when I got him.

[Keli]

Sounds like a wonderful day with some of your favorite people! What more could you ask for?
PS I love the feet sticking out of the trunk. When my kids were smaller, we had a lone hand sticking out around Halloween time. It was fun!

[kev]

Allissa's so cute!

I have learned from experience the only way to end the endless loop that is the "small child asking why" game is to turn the tables on them. Example:

Child: "What's Papaw doin'?"

Adult: "He's putting gas in the car."

Child: "Why?"

Adult: "Good question. I was just about to ask you the same thing."

Child: "..."

Adult: "Why do they call it 'Grape Nuts' when it doesn't have grapes or nuts in it?"

Child: "..."

Adult: "Why did scientists invent black liquorish? Seriously, what's the point?"

Kids love me, by the way.

[Jennifer]

@Keli ... girl that foot brought me up short. It looked very real~!!!

@Kev ... oh, I'm sure they do! I wish I'd thought to say those things to her, just to see the look on her face! The funny thing about Allissa that I didn't mention is the WAY she says "Why?" Her voice is very deep and she doesn't pronounce the soft "wh" sound at all. It comes out more like a dry-sounding "Wye" and she drags it out. So when she says "Why?" what you really get is "Wyyyyyyyyyye?" Real deep and low, kind of down in her throat. She does it for effect. Cute kid. Works every time.

[JT]

You made it to McLeod Farms! Hooray! I love the pictures, you take the best photos.